Cuckoo in the nest

I don't think too much about having been adopted, of course I don't, I am almost seventy for f...s sake, it is a long time ago!
But as with all traumatic events(and it WAS traumatic!) they leave an indelible and irreversible mark on each of us. The more I know and learn about epigenetics and neuro-science, the more I understand  about the physical changes that occur. And in the same way as other traumas, there will be  "triggers", out of our control, when a sudden smell or sound or witnessing a repetition of an event, sets off that trigger and puts us right back back in the trauma.
I have talked a lot about having been "bought" and being brought up in that strict and  superstitious toxic catholic environment, with all of the damage and abuse that was incurred. 
But I have never been so "triggered" by the adoption stuff , as I am at present when I am hearing about a little girl who is to be adopted, in what I consider to be an equally inappropriate way. I am finding myself getting really angry.
She is seven years old, has a brother who is only ten months younger than her, and who she has never been separated from. She lives with him in a very nice foster family,where she has been for eighteen months,  having been removed from her birth family twice already.
The foster family have looked after her very well, she has a lovely bedroom, the family have a labrador puppy, she is in  a school she likes, had  a tea party for her birthday, and the family have weaned her off vast amounts of sugar, introduced her to vegetables and shown her how to grow her own little vegetable patch.
She is to be adopted by a sour faced and very bitter single woman of fifty, who lives in a house that looks like it was furnished  for an eighty year old. She is a professional woman, and so therefore believes that she is an ideal parent. She is vegetarian, the child is not (So we will see about that!she says) She wants a child who is "being good at school, and is not a fussy eater"She has VERY strong opinions about "boundaries" and is argumentative and arrogant.I am told that these days, adoptive parents are put through stringent "checks" but in this case I cannot see that it was anywhere near robust enough.
I feel so distraught about it! I want to go and rescue her, I hate the idea of her being brought up, like I was, as a toy for some embittered and unhappy woman. I cannot get it off my mind.
Adoption is NOT always the answer! We seem, as a society to feel the need to get unwanted children into other people's  "homes" as quickly as possible. Of course there are happy stories, I could not deny that, but there are far more that are not.
I fear this child will feel like me, a cuckoo in a nest, an alien in a world she cannot relate to.I fear that like me every time she does something wrong it will be blamed on her "bad blood" whereas every time she does something well it will be because of this woman's benevolence.
I remember as a very small child having my hair permed because my mother wanted a curly haired child! She changed my name from Christine to Susan, because there was another child somewhere in the family with the same name, and so many other things I could go on and on with.  
You know, it is actually ok to be a lone child, perhaps even  in an institution, as long as you are in an environment where you are valued and prepared for the future when you can make many changes and dreams come true!
For me there is nothing worse than feeling you have to "perform" for your needs to be met, where love is only ever earned and can be withdrawn as easily.
There has to be another way! Somewhere where she can learn that she is a precious and irreplaceable unique part of the Universe, and is made of Stardust!