Today my husband is 70!! He says he never thought he would make it past nineteen!
I am so glad he did, we all would be a lot poorer without his presence.
Apart from being an amazing artist, an extraordinary drummer and a brilliant cook,this is the man who took me on board, with six children and more baggage than Piccadilly's lost luggage dept.!
When we first met, and were "going out" as they say, he very often asked me "out for a drink", and of course I don't drink! He wanted to know why? and at that point I didn't think it was any of his business!
But as we got more involved, and it was clear that something was happening between us, I thought I had better tell him all about me! I thought if he was going to get involved with me he should have all the chances in the world to walk away.
So one night I sat him down, and gave him the lot, all the drinking , all the chemicals, all the shit! I think I probably laid it on a bit so he had absolutely no illusions!
It took a good three hours, and his face steadily became more and more serious.
When I had finished, waiting for a "walk out" he just said:
" Thank fuck for that ! I thought you were going to tell me you are gay!
That is the man who I have been married to for 28 years, and who is still making me laugh!
Happy Birthday Gez XXXXX
On the radio today I was asked what I thought about the statute of limitation applied to survivors of childhood sexual abuse desiring to bring a complaint?
Well it is quite clear what I think- it is quite appalling! When you consider that sometimes it takes a victims fifty years before they are able to talk about what happened to them, let alone bring themselves to go as far as a court case, then to put any kind of limitation on these crimes is nonsense.
There is no time limit for murder, and I make no excuses for suggesting that these crimes should be seen as comparable.
I was then asked what I thought about the Criminal Injury board denying claims for compensation for victims, regardless of the fact that there had ben a guilty verdict for their perpetrators, because some of the victims had subsequently been convicted themselves for other offenses!
How bloody judgemental can you get! These victims had their lives turned completely upside down when they were vulnerable children, in the worst way possible, and put on an entirely different and lonely path, hardly surprising that they turn to drugs and drink and maybe crime!
Then they are obviously considered "less worthy" of compensation than other victims of crimes-Disgraceful.
I was then asked how I felt about it being said that some victims of exploitation "consented" to their abuse! WTF!
Everything I know about healthcare(and that is my job) tells me that to ascertain consent from another person for anything, the criteria must always be that it is "Informed consent" as the dictionary has it:
"An informed consent can be said to have been given based upon a clear appreciation and understanding of the facts, implications,and consequences of an action"
So apart from the fact that they are children!
Are the victims of sexual abuse told of those consequences?
Are they "informed" of the implications? That what is happening to them may cause them brain damage, damage to their immune systems,shortened life span, rob them of their potential, give them higher incidences of addictions,(abuse victims are 4,600 times more likely to be addicted than the rest of the population!) mental health problems, and suicide???
Of course they are NOT!
So how the f... can they possibly be said to have "consented"
It is hardly surprising that survivors of childhood sexual abuse feel that the system is stacked against them...because it is!
