Having been present at the debate last Tuesday with Richard Swinbourne et al. during "Think Week" in Oxford .I have a couple of comments.
Firstly that it was very fair and democratic of the rest of the panel , and the chair, to allow his long winded diatribe. Truly "freedom of expression" in action!
But PLEASE ! What a load of professorial hogwash. Bad enough that we were subjected to his pomposity and meanderings, but the suggestion that everything "evil" that happens to people is god's way of making them strong is beyond belief. Offensive and ill informed, he alluded to the holocaust as a way of making Jewish people strong, and when questioned , with remarkable tolerance ,I thought, he replied that if anyone has a "bad" experience it strengthens them ,thanks to "god's" interventions? Lucky them! A complete distortion of what most thinking people understand, that "whatever doesn't kill you makes you strong" Tell my fellow survivors of catholic clergy abuse how thankful they should be.
It is called SURVIVAL professor! And most of us had no choice!
What part of my experiences at the hands of a catholic priest should I be grateful for exactly? That I wasn't raped more often? that at least I was ten and not three? That I didn't die? That although my teens and twenties and early thirties were destroyed, I managed to survive and now I appear "o.k"? How much of the suffering of my disabled friends from Verona should they be grateful for? That they only had to perform oral sex on priests every other day rather than every day? That for one man there were only sixteen priests who raped him when he was a child and not sixty?
Thank you so much Professor for pointing out our extreme good fortune. I am sure the women in Rwanda should be grateful, and the AIDS orphans, what about the starving people in the rest of World, how lucky are they!
Perhaps if we all are so strengthened by your "god's " desire for us to have a bloody awful time, we should do everyone else a favour and go out and beat the living shit out of grannies and maybe rob a few blind people, maybe run over a few cyclists and set fire to traffic wardens. perhaps we are being utterly selfish by trying not to harm any living creature? shame on us, we are not allowing anyone else to experience our good luck! I am sure they would be grateful for the strength we could help them acquire!
It was NATURE herself who gave us the skills we needed to survive, despite our ordeals, not because of them. And some of us have been able to transform that pain by helping others like us, turning the crap that was thrown at us into manure to grow something more beautiful .Of all the people that DO survive these atrocities, I suspect there are far more who do not.
So please Professor if you cannot think of any other reason to demonstrate your god's goodness, perhaps you should try keeping your mouth shut.
Sue Cox
Monday 27 February 2012
OXFORD THINK WEEK 2012
Well, now is the time to write and tell everyone about the fantastic Oxford "Think Week"! So hard to know where to start, there were so many highlights and so much food for "thought"!
But the overwhelming experience for me was just being there! To be with those wonderful students and others who made it so special, included me, and worked so hard.
I had been quite overwhelmed already when I got the email to say that the committee wanted to raise money this year at the lectures for an organisation they thought worthwhile, and they had chosen us! I cried for ten minutes, and when I Skyped Ton in Holland he did the same. Sounds a bit over the top? Well, perhaps, but when you think how hard it has been for us and other abuse survivors like us, to find meaning in a World that we felt we no longer belonged in, this kind of gesture is so precious.
catholic clergy abuse survivors are all wary of others! our "trust" mechanisms are often destroyed, or certainly distorted, even as we get old, there are things that do not go away. I for example don't like being in certain surroundings (like churches)! I have a very sensitive "bullshit" detector, and I have a problem with certain smells! But if we are hyper-vigilant towards attack, we are also super tuned to decency and kindness and human altruism. So in a way we are creatures of extremes. Yes, there is the agony, but we are very much capable of the ecstasy too!
And with everyone at "Think Week" I experienced warm human connections , kindness, intelligent thoughtful observations and questions from from almost everyone I encountered. Empathy, respect , and no sign of condescension or patronising! What a gift!
I have to name names, because they deserve to be thanked, and also because my other wonderful fellow survivors weren't there and will want to know All the details!
So first and foremost to Joseph Trakalo, who drove "Think Week" forward, gently steering the group, and making me, and everyone else feel like a "VIP'! THANKYOU!
To Ben and Annie, two delightful students and members of the AHS who chaired, introduced ,and hosted so beautifully.Thankyou!
To all of the other helpers in their striking blue "think-week" tee-shirts who were tireless, and the thoughtful individual conversations I had with them. Thankyou!
To the Oxford Humanist committee who chose us as their organisation to support and chatted all about our work as we all had those lovely dinners together.Thankyou!
To the speakers who were often inspiring - Professors Richard Dawkins, Peter Atkins, especially-Thankyou!
To Paula Kirby for her wonderful support,interest in our cause, and her warmth and clarity Thankyou!
I will write about the remarks from Richard Swinbourn seperately, I don't want any negativity here! But thanks for Paula's comments to him!
To The Richard Dawkins foundation for sponsoring this event Thankyou!
To everyone who brought food to share at our "celebration" gathering on Sunday, what a feast. To all the new friends I have made ,and to the lovely Chloe who lead us in a beautiful rendition of "Every sperm is sacred"!
And not least to everyone who dipped into their pockets even in these harsher times, and managed to raise £150 for Survivors Voice Europe .THANK YOU !
Survivors Voice Europe is perhaps a little different from most similar organisations,our emphasis is very much on empowerment. We really have never asked for any funding, preferring to try and support ourselves as far as possible. But There is no doubt that these days every little bit we can raise makes such a difference. For example, what "THINK WEEK" contributed will help us with our "Annual celebration of survivors of catholic clergy day!" which will from now on be held in Verona, and this year will be on June 30th.Last year we set off a hundred chinese lanterns saying "ENOUGH" in all our languages into the sky in Rome in front of the vatican, as we danced to celebrate our survival, despite the catholic church, and certainly not because of it. This year we want it to be two hundred!
Connections with others like ourselves are so important, isolation has been a big feature of the legacy of abuse, so that day is crucial as a focus for many. Thankyou for contributing to that! ( But it would be wonderful if you could come and celebrate with us!! Please do try.)
There are some fabulous books about clerical abuse, mostly written in Italian, we would dearly like to have them translated and published into all our languages, so thankyou for contributing to that!
We have a wonderful photographic monument in progress, by Silvia Amodio, who shows that often pictures speak far louder than words. Check out the "Out of the Shadows video on our website .She would like to keep on extending that monument, so thankyou also for contributing to that!
But more than anything, thankyou for this wonderful gesture, it has meant so much to us. And as a new member of the Oxford Humanists, I hope that next year I can be on the side of the helpers when we meet for "Think Week" 2013!!
Sue Cox Survivors Voice Europe
XXX
Sunday 12 February 2012
Freedom of Expression campaign One law for all Saturday 11th February.
My contribution
Sue Cox Survivors Voice Europe
Survivors Voice is an International organisation of men and women who were sexually abused in their childhood by catholic priests.
It is always tempting when asked to speak at these occasions to talk exclusively about ones own organisation, but today I am here to support very strongly "One Law for All "and this campaign for freedom of expression.To support Anne Marie and Maryame, and the students and Universities who have all taken such a brave stance against these appalling incidences. So although my particular "Bete Noir" is the catholic church, I know that tyrants names and faces may be different, but the damage they do is the same, the pain they inflict is the same. Threatening free speech diminishes me as a woman, as a human being, and without a stand it could diminish my children's generation and my grandchildren's generation.
The name survivors VOICE was chosen for that reason, because for centuries survivors had no voice.
Survivors voice came about for me after being asked to speak at the "protest the pope"campaign in 2010. It was very honoured to do so, but also had no idea that I would be in front of twenty-thousand people! When I looked out at that sea of faces it took my breath away! And those posters! What a sight, creative, amusing and very very real.
I was scared, ill equipped, but with YOUR help I managed to get those words out! And because of your warmth and support I became strong! I became able to embark on this "mission" of Survivors Voice Europe. Your support as we marched and dedicated that march to survivors of catholic clergy abuse was awesome, and something that I doubt could happen elsewhere.
Because you made me strong and braver, I was able to go to Rome and join with others to do the same thing, we danced in front of vatican square in celebration of all of our survival, despite them rather than because of them! We have been back three times now, and also to Verona where some of our bravest members live. They are all deaf and speech impaired people from the Provolo institute in Verona, all of whom were seriously and systematically abused by the clergy who were supposed to be looking after them, one man by sixteen priests! he was just past around like a piece of meat.They are probably some of the bravest people I know, and they don't HAVE a voice, they can't talk and they can't hear, but they are making a stand! They had not been able to do that publicly until we arrived that October and joined with them. YOU helped with that! Their posters when we meet are also awesome, have the same humour and irony and this in a country where they are not allowed to talk about what happened to them! These crimes are rarely reported in the media, And this is Italy! Just 1 and a half hours away on a plane. Last time we were there, Marco and I took with us the pictures and videos of the "protest the pope" march and the "secular Europe campaign ", our friends had never seen them! They had no idea that something this big had happened, it simply was not reported in Italy.Their chins were on their chests! This is all about free speech and free expression!
You are not allowed to have banners anywhere near the vatican, or even tee shirts with slogans on! In fact you aren't able to have banners within 500 yards of vatican square! They might "offend" Il Papa! Well, the vatican and it's narcissistic regime offends me!
Last October we met again, in Piazza Castel SantAngelo opposite the vatican, and there were police and a helicopter making sure we did not "offend" At one point the helicopter wired down to the police to remove an elderly deaf man's poster which said "RATZINGER OUT!" they said it was offensive and they took it off him! He simply picked up someone else's and carried it higher! And we ended the day by sending up hundreds of `Chinese lanterns saying "ENOUGH" into the sky! Hard for the helicopter to get rid of! And in the end some of the police clapped and cheered!
This matters! If I don't use my voice as I am able to, then I will be ashamed in the presence of those who cannot.
When I knew I was going to say a few words today I looked up the idea of free expression in the hope that someone cleverer than me could give me a tip! The only thing I found was a quote by George Washington, (I don't know how appropriate that is!) But I liked the quote!
It says "If we take away freedom of speech then we will be led ,dumb and silent like lambs to the slaughter" Looking at that quote it can either be wise words or even a "tip" to a tyrannical regime! "If you take away their freedom of speech you can lead them dumb and silent like lambs to the slaughter" clever!
But I will go back to that wonderful "pope protest" in London and those amazing posters and banners! There was one that stood out for me, one of you here may have made it! And in fact I have it cut out and posted on the wall next to my desk. Inspiring me every day it says :
FUCK OFF BACK TO THE 14th CENTURY!
Where else in this beautiful World can you say that! We have to Cherish that right and defend it!!!
Sue Cox Survivors Voice Europe
Survivors Voice is an International organisation of men and women who were sexually abused in their childhood by catholic priests.
It is always tempting when asked to speak at these occasions to talk exclusively about ones own organisation, but today I am here to support very strongly "One Law for All "and this campaign for freedom of expression.To support Anne Marie and Maryame, and the students and Universities who have all taken such a brave stance against these appalling incidences. So although my particular "Bete Noir" is the catholic church, I know that tyrants names and faces may be different, but the damage they do is the same, the pain they inflict is the same. Threatening free speech diminishes me as a woman, as a human being, and without a stand it could diminish my children's generation and my grandchildren's generation.
The name survivors VOICE was chosen for that reason, because for centuries survivors had no voice.
Survivors voice came about for me after being asked to speak at the "protest the pope"campaign in 2010. It was very honoured to do so, but also had no idea that I would be in front of twenty-thousand people! When I looked out at that sea of faces it took my breath away! And those posters! What a sight, creative, amusing and very very real.
I was scared, ill equipped, but with YOUR help I managed to get those words out! And because of your warmth and support I became strong! I became able to embark on this "mission" of Survivors Voice Europe. Your support as we marched and dedicated that march to survivors of catholic clergy abuse was awesome, and something that I doubt could happen elsewhere.
Because you made me strong and braver, I was able to go to Rome and join with others to do the same thing, we danced in front of vatican square in celebration of all of our survival, despite them rather than because of them! We have been back three times now, and also to Verona where some of our bravest members live. They are all deaf and speech impaired people from the Provolo institute in Verona, all of whom were seriously and systematically abused by the clergy who were supposed to be looking after them, one man by sixteen priests! he was just past around like a piece of meat.They are probably some of the bravest people I know, and they don't HAVE a voice, they can't talk and they can't hear, but they are making a stand! They had not been able to do that publicly until we arrived that October and joined with them. YOU helped with that! Their posters when we meet are also awesome, have the same humour and irony and this in a country where they are not allowed to talk about what happened to them! These crimes are rarely reported in the media, And this is Italy! Just 1 and a half hours away on a plane. Last time we were there, Marco and I took with us the pictures and videos of the "protest the pope" march and the "secular Europe campaign ", our friends had never seen them! They had no idea that something this big had happened, it simply was not reported in Italy.Their chins were on their chests! This is all about free speech and free expression!
You are not allowed to have banners anywhere near the vatican, or even tee shirts with slogans on! In fact you aren't able to have banners within 500 yards of vatican square! They might "offend" Il Papa! Well, the vatican and it's narcissistic regime offends me!
Last October we met again, in Piazza Castel SantAngelo opposite the vatican, and there were police and a helicopter making sure we did not "offend" At one point the helicopter wired down to the police to remove an elderly deaf man's poster which said "RATZINGER OUT!" they said it was offensive and they took it off him! He simply picked up someone else's and carried it higher! And we ended the day by sending up hundreds of `Chinese lanterns saying "ENOUGH" into the sky! Hard for the helicopter to get rid of! And in the end some of the police clapped and cheered!
This matters! If I don't use my voice as I am able to, then I will be ashamed in the presence of those who cannot.
When I knew I was going to say a few words today I looked up the idea of free expression in the hope that someone cleverer than me could give me a tip! The only thing I found was a quote by George Washington, (I don't know how appropriate that is!) But I liked the quote!
It says "If we take away freedom of speech then we will be led ,dumb and silent like lambs to the slaughter" Looking at that quote it can either be wise words or even a "tip" to a tyrannical regime! "If you take away their freedom of speech you can lead them dumb and silent like lambs to the slaughter" clever!
But I will go back to that wonderful "pope protest" in London and those amazing posters and banners! There was one that stood out for me, one of you here may have made it! And in fact I have it cut out and posted on the wall next to my desk. Inspiring me every day it says :
FUCK OFF BACK TO THE 14th CENTURY!
Where else in this beautiful World can you say that! We have to Cherish that right and defend it!!!
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